Crocodile Lagoon And My Near Death Experience

During the last evening of the Jungle trip, we were invited to take a 9pm night walk by flashlite, to search for crocodiles in the nearby lagoon. At night, I'm told if you shine the flashlite onto the red crocodile eyes, they light up (in the same way that the car headlights light up deer eyes) We had a group, which included 2 women besides me, our tour guide, and "Susan", an Ecuadorian man who loves to wear makeup. We walked carefully in the pitch dark, moonless evening on a ragged, muddy path high above the bank edge of the lagoon. I was told the lagoon is filled with caiman (crocodiles).
This reminded me a bit like my childhood "night walks" in Northern California looking for "big foot".



But unfortunately, we didn´t get too far around the lagoon. There was complete black darkness and I was the last one on the trail........who would think it could happen?

The soft ground gave away and I fell straight down the embankment and landed about 10 feet straight down directly into the swamp perhaps 3 feet from the side. It happened so quickly.....it was a soft, chocolate landing and my left foot (rubber boot) was stuck in the mud below the water, at about waist deep. Amazingly, I didn´t panic, but of course my first thought was ¨crocodile¨ and to get out as soon as possible. All I could do was reach out for the large root, but felt stuck and it was very slippery and slimy to hang onto. Come to think about it, I could have grabbed onto a crocodile and not known it. I called out to the group (but not too loud)¨I need help...please hurry!
¨
To my rescue, I could hear thevoices of the 2 girls coming downhill,"Marina" a 21 y-o Red Cross lifesaver and "Susan" who apparantly didn't mind getting her makeup smeared. The girls were able to pull me out, after my failed slippery attempts. Basically, they saved my life and/or my body parts. Interestingly, the crocodiles remained asleep, because none were seen nearby.

After being helped to the top ....I was shaking and nauseous. But the good news was that I was not injured, except for some cuts and bruises to my hand and a sore hip. Sadly, my new Olympus camera and cell phone, tucked into my zippered pockets, were soaked and non-functioning.

So for now, it feels shaky to think about it.
What was my lesson? Why did I need it to happen to me?

When in the water, I felt very focused on getting out......I didn´t panic. Does that mean I´ve become brave in my older age?
Did I not panic because of my past years of emergency room experience,as a nurse.One thing I learned is that there are people right there, choosing to risking their own lives, to help otheres.
In the past few years, I have had a recurrant thought that if something happened to me and if I die, I am ready to go. I haven´t felt fearful of death....it almost feels comforting. I feel I´ve lived a good life and I´m at a good place in my life.But surely, I wouldn´t choose to leave my body in a traumatic way, like being eaten up by crocodiles.

And I wouldn´t want to leave without saying goodby to my son, family, and my friends.....to tell them how much they mean to me and how much I love them.

Later, I learned that these up to 10 foot long Caimans do not normally attack humans, but prefer small animals. They start to get hungry in the late afternoon and park themselves along the edges of the lagoon banks. I may have, in fact, scared them!
Still, I do not want to ever again test out this theory.